This decree starts with the strong
belief that everyone should want to volunteer their services. "We're asking
everyone to agree to take a turn baby-sitting the system over the weekends."
"This milestone is so important that we would like everyone to contribute
their evenings to the effort for the next month." Where's the damage? Coerced
acceptance replaces the voluntary kind. This robs the "volunteer" of choice.
If there is no choice, why not just say there's no choice? Pretending there's
a choice leaves the commanded feeling manipulated. Because coerced acceptance
easily falls apart under stress, the commander is often surprised by feeling
betrayed in this interaction, too.
Working well together sometimes means ordering people around. This works
best if, when there is no choice, choice is not implied. When given a choiceless
choice, commenting on it might help identify it for what it really is.
Quiet acceptance might light your slow burning fuse.